Everyone loves a funny speech.  But funny speeches are really, really hard to write, and even harder to execute.  Over the last decade of speech writing, I’ve found that more often than not, my clients WANT funny speeches.  And generally, I advise against it.

WHY?

Because your speech runs a high risk of tanking if you try to channel Jerry Seinfeld.  Only Jerry Seinfeld can be Jerry Seinfeld.  It’s usually not worth the risk.  However, if you follow these simple rules, you can deliver an interesting, amusing and clever speech without the pitfalls of attempted (and failed) humour.

DON’T OFFEND ANYONE

Jokes made at other people’s expense typically come across as mean spirited and inappropriate.  If you really must insult someone, choose some generic (and nameless) person you encountered at the grocery store – not your spouse or boss!

USE ANECDOTES

The most effective humor is usually borne from personal experience.  Share a funny story or experience, and draw humor from those encounters.

KEEP IT CLEAN

The use of profanity rarely enhances a speech or elicits a laugh, especially when you are speaking on an important day.  Unless you really need to drive home a point and an f-bomb is going to grab your audience’s attention, rather leave it out.  And as a general rule, 2 or 3 profane references is more than enough.

BE THE BUTT OF YOUR OWN JOKE

This relates to the first rule (don’t offend anyone).  Rather than offending others, rely on a little self deprecation.  Positioning yourself as the butt of your own joke is a safe way to integrate humor into your speech.

SEEK PROFESSIONAL HELP

Speaking, and even more so joking, off the cuff is an absolute no-no.   Always be prepared and if you don’t feel confident about your own speech writing skills, hire a professional or purchase a pre-written speech.

Have you ever written or delivered a funny speech?  What strategies work for you?

I have a freelance writing blog and my clients outsource their communication needs, ranging from press releases, web copy, case studies and newsletter content.  In most cases, I write the copy and the client takes credit.  It’s fairly standard procedure.

But for some reason, there is a lot of shame and guilt associated with outsourced speech writing and I’m not entirely certain why. I think most people would agree that not everyone can write…and speech writing is especially challenging.  So why is there an expectation that every groom, bride, bar mitzvah boy, high school graduate, birthday celebrant and Board chair should be able to craft a speech that resonates?  It doesn’t make sense.

The truth is, the speech is more likely to have impact if it is outsourced to a professional.  And quality custom speech writing services provide ample opportunity for the client to interject their personal thoughts, feelings and ideas so the finished product reflects their specific point of view and personality.  Even a pre-written speech can serve as a helpful template to write a speech that is better than what you might have written on your own.

There are other good reasons to consider outsourcing your speech writing, beyond the fact that you may not be an expert writer.

• The event is too emotionally charged (like a funeral) for you to gather your thoughts constructively
• You are overwhelmed with other responsibilities (planning a wedding perhaps) and need some extra support to get the speech done
• You are extremely nervous and don’t have the confidence to write the speech or deliver it effectively

Those of you who have frequented the SpeechWhiz website before have likely noticed that it’s been overhauled.  I’m a freelance writer, and I’ve spent the last several months navigating the blogosphere; it became very obvious very quickly that I could offer more to my SpeechWhiz clients by building the website on a WordPress platform, for better interactivity and customization.  So welcome!  And thanks for stopping by.

I’ve owned SpeechWhiz for seven years, and in that time, I have helped hundreds of people prepare speeches for weddings, Bar Mitzvahs, fundraising events, funerals and birthday parties.  You name the occasion – I’ve written the speech.  I’ve helped Fortune 500 business execs and 18-year-old valedictorians.  Anxieties about speech writing seem to be fairly indiscriminate.  Through this blog, I hope to bring you useful, actionable tips and advice on speech writing, speech delivery and other related topics.

Chances are, you’re here because you have a speech to write and deliver in the near future.  If it’s a special occasion that you are celebrating, congrats!  If you are feeling overwhelmed or nervous – no worries, I can help!  I thought I would initiate this blog by sharing the #1 rule for success, when it comes to speech writing.  It’s pretty simple, really, and if you follow this rule, you will have won half the battle.

BE PREPARED

That’s it.  Be prepared.  The more prepared, the better.  Sometimes, very skilled orators can deliver speeches off the cuff – but that is a rare gift.  More often than not, it’s a recipe for disaster.  Think of the greatest speeches of all time – Lincoln’s Gettysburg Address, Martin Luther King Jr.’s “I Have a Dream”, Ronald Reagan’s Shuttle Challenger ‘Disaster’ speech, they were all prepared well in advanced, rehearsed, vetted, reviewed and analyzed.  If you want to leave a good impression and have a memorable impact on your audience….be prepared.

So, how do you prepare?  Jotting down a few notes and spending a moment thinking it through isn’t sufficient.

You need to write the speech ahead of time, and practice it – at least three or four times, ideally in front of a mirror (or a live person).  Solicit feedback, tweak it, rewrite it, pare it down until it is exactly where you want it to be.

Of course, not everyone can write well.  And if you are one of those folks consider purchasing a prewritten speech.  You can either use that as a template and customize it to your needs, or use it as-is, and plug in your specific information.  It’s better to deliver a prewritten speech that is good than to rely on a stream of consciousness ramble that is sure to fail.

There are other ways to prepare – even once the speech is written.

Take note of the podium and make sure that the lighting is adequate.

Have a glass of water handy, and position the microphone properly so that everyone will hear the speech.

Deliver the speech at the right time – not while dessert is being served (too much clanging of plates and cutlery), not while everyone is finding their seat (too much conversation and shuffling around), and not too late into the function (too many people will have left, or will be tired and distracted).  The best time to deliver the speech is after everyone is settled, at a moment of quiet.

Have your speech printed out on cue cards (not papers) to cut down on shuffling and keep your thoughts concisely organized in small and pointed messages.

If you follow this rule of preparedness, your speech will likely be received the way you intended, and the impression will be a positive one.

What other tips help you to feel confident when you deliver a speech?